bring on the hooker shoes: a product review.

so one of the various perks (or is it a curse) of being a blogger, is that sometimes i get asked to review things.  companies send me free shit in exchange for a review, and sometimes i actually even write one. like today!

usually, i product test things that are either edible (debatable in some cases), or that i can easily smear on my face/body during my morning routine. so when i got these dr. scholls for her high heel inserts (from my current favorite blog-swag provider, bzzagent), i wasn’t quite sure what to do.  i actually own a lot of high heels, so that wasn’t the problem. but tragically, i just don’t have many opportunities to actually wear them.  on account of the whole not driving thing, i tend to be perpetually in flats- except for the odd “special occasion” (which are pretty rare in my universe).

anyway, i was supposed to test these puppies out, but no high-heel bearing days presented themselves (stacey london would be so ashamed). so i did what any dedicated product tester would do- i decided to do my laundry in a pair of four inch hot pink patent peep toes that i hadn’t worn since my ill fated wedding back in 2007.  that’s right, i tottered around my bedroom & basement in hot pink heels and my laundry day sweatpants for 3 hours (i did allow short safety breaks when carrying large quantities of laundry down flights of stairs. like hell i’m gonna break both my legs for a pair of $12 insoles).

here is what i learned during my very scientific testing process.

holy spring cleaning jackpot batman: an ode to free stuff.

despite the fact that my attempts at going dairy free are not going quite  as planned (and certainly not providing the result that i think the silk company was looking for), i am still grateful to the fine folks at bzzagent for hooking me up with the free soymilk. i love free stuff, and i am always completely shocked when companies are willing to throw it at me just because i MIGHT be willing to discuss their product online.

remember that time that time i got that full sized bottle of pantene in the mail from vocalpoint? i sent that shit to preble street, and nobody even noticed. why just last week they offered me a free pint of some sort of flavored creamer (which will hopefully go a bit better than my last unsavory creamer incident).

but back to bzzagent. after many months of not getting offered crap from them (free redbox rental- big whoop), i got the soy milk offer AND an SC johnson cleaning product offer all in one week. my silk package arrived in an envelope, just coupons and a handful of propaganda that i didn’t read (sorry silk!) (sort of). so i figured that my spring cleaning kit would also show up in booklet form.

instead, i got this:

lactose intolerant.

well, for a few days at least. those crazy cats over at bzzagent sent me free silk soymilk coupons under the condition that i give up milk for 10 days (like it’s some sort of challenge or something). not one to back away from a challenge (especially one that involves me getting free stuff), i decided that i’m not only giving up milk for 10 days, i’m giving  all dairy.

i have sort of a cheese and butter problem to start with, even though my personal ethics would really love for me to be a vegan. i thought this would be a good way for me to test the dairy free waters, without any major commitments or expectations. although i already spent over $100 on dairy free groceries that i am convinced will help me make it through the tough times that i assume to be ahead. what i’ve learned so far:

totally buzzed.

it’s no secret that i love me some free stuff. now i’ve proclaimed my love for vocalpoint many a time… as i have long considered it the king of the product testing/free shit sites with their seductive full size samples and fistfuls of high value coupons. except that lately, vocalpoint has left me a little cold. i mean how many boxes of kashi cereal can one girl really eat? oh, and the bounce dryer bar was just about the stupidest invention EVER. but i suppose even like 100 lame lowes coupons are better than a completely barren landscape.  i had tried kraft first taste and pssst! but got a big fat delivery of BUNK. even myblogspark has forsaken me!

but a few months back, i saw a post on ilovetogossip regarding a service i had never heard about… bzzagent. basically it was the same old song and dance where they say they’ll send you free products, in exchange for tweeting that shit up, or writing about it on your blog.  but then, all they offered me for like months and month was a crappy free redbox rental. boo! but a couple of weeks ago… THEY FINALLY SENT ME SOMETHING THAT I WANTED!

last week my coupons & “press kit” for thomas’ bagel thins arrived in the mail. a $4/1 coupon, 5 $1/1 coupons, some educational materials, and of course, not 1 but 3 bagel shaped magnets. it’s no secret that i’m in a perpetual state of vaguely trying to lose weight. i also have a deep and unquenchable lust for bagels. thus, a free bag of 110 calorie diet bagels seemed like an awesome idea. and in many ways, it was. here are 5 things i learned about bagel thins from my recent quality time alone with them: