packing it in.

i packed my first box today.

13 actually. 13 paper boxes full of books, dvds, and things that will probably get broken in transit despite their many layered protective newspaper cocoons. theoretically, this should be good news (especially for my breakables). but really, i’ve got 4 days until my movers show up, and i’ve only packed about 1/8 of everything i own. and that was the easy bit. unfortunately, the rest of my apartment is far less square and regular than my book and dvd collections.

and now, here i am, watching netflix and writing instead of playing through the pain and packing up my kitchen implements before i have time to forget that i’m moving and accidentally get them all dirty again.

thing is, i don’t want to move.

weekend pickthrough- put your sorries in a sack edition.

yeah. it’s been a ROUGH WEEK, and holy shit i’m sorry i haven’t posted. this is actually the longest i’ve ever gone neglecting my poor blog, but i assure you it was necessary! 6:30 am get up and walk dog, 7:45 am leave for work, 5 pm leave work, 5:15 pm grab a snack and pack bag, 6 pm arrive at show for performance, 11 pm return home from performance, eat snack, do laundry if applicable, 12-2 am go to sleep- maybe. wash. rinse. repeat.

i finally got a chance to sleep a bit this weekend (ok, 12 hours each night), but i still feel like i’m gasping for breath. and as i’m slowly bobbing to the surface for air, the universe is stuffing an xmas stocking in my mouth trying to smother me a bit further. anyway, i know my apologies mean nothing, but i’m giving them to you anyway (and you’ll take them! or else!).

here’s some mass linkage to help ease the pain. you may even get a real entry tomorrow!

waking up to a freshly ironed dress and a half-eaten watermelon, gary suspected elaine was back on ambien.

welcome to photo 1. please leave your photos of homeless squirrels romping in a graveyard as shot through your rearview mirror at the door.

harness the force and make yourself some festive last minute party decorations.

the free press compares hannaford, trader joes, and whole foods so that i don’t have to.

kind of a cool idea, until someone tries to rob you.

epic local cupcake showdown. and i do mean epic. oh, and epic over here too.

wow, this whitman’s sampler is serious about putting the christ back in christmas.

can’t go wrong with a heartwarming xmas tale where the punchline is “NAKED SANTA”.

3 bedrooms, 4 baths, and an unspeakable loneliness we can’t contemplate.

and emotionally scarring human interest story to brighten your morning!

best ink cartridge description EVER.

dewey decimal THIS.

 

bummed out.

i decided to take a little break from posting this weekend because things got really crappy for a minute and i just wanted to hide in a hole at the bottom of the sea. it’s all for the best really, all i really would have been capable of yesterday was mashing my hands against the keyboard in rage, or maybe coughing up a little phlegm. not as compelling and one might like. the grisly details:

1. i am still sick. 2 weeks now, and i’m not feeling any better. in addition to being a mucous filled sack, i apparently have also developed a case of glossopharyngeal neuralgia (intermittent stabbing throat pain) that may or may not go away when i get better.

2. i was really excited to be having my very first sponsored giveaway next week, until i found out that the product mysteriously contains GELATIN. as a faithful veg, i just can’t bring myself to pimp the meat products on my blog- no matter how plush the swag. (more on this later)

3. i just got a hot and heavy not from my condo association president who says that me and the boyfriend unit and i need to come up with $5000 by june to pay for a new roof. you mean those cutting boards we nailed over the missing shingles aren’t doing the job? fuck. good thing i didn’t blow my amateur night load yet, looks like i’m gonna need it.

4. did i mention that my insurance company isn’t returning my calls about the water damage that occurred over a month ago?

5. i got my 2nd really mean comment today, and although i realize that it is a hazard of the trade… it makes me sad when people who don’t care for my opinion about something attack me directly, instead of defending or presenting their own opinion. just because we disagree on one particular point doesn’t make me a demon, does it?

anyway, you can see why a girl might be a touch on the grouchy side. i had high hopes for this weekend, and on top of the crappy crap that happened, i didn’t get fuck all done (unless you count staying up until 4 am updating my linkedin profile). i enter into this week on a “$5000 in the shit” super low, with no sleep and no clean socks. oh, and i’m probably going to have to send back that sweet free bathrobe.

looking back.

2009 was a crazy-ass ride for me. i actually can’t remember a year that was more wonderful and more awful all rolled up together. the ciff’s notes version of my 2009 (in rough chronological order): i got divorced, started therapy, started medication, gained 30 lbs, bought a house (well, condo really), renovated perviously referenced condo, stopped medication, stayed fat, started blog, costumed nightmare burlesque show, was diagnosed with hypothyroid, got through nightmare xmas, ended up here.

after such a blitz of total insanity, i think it’s hard not to make a boatload of outrageous resolutions about how at this time next year i’m going to be a totally different, and totally better, person. but for right now i’d like to hold off on the plans for next year for a minute, and look at some of the things what went right this year (blogwise of course):

– i got 5 boxes of cereal for $1.50

– i got 18 bars of soap for $2.49

– the coupon goddess made me feel like a rockstar

– i bought all of my OCT meds for dirt dirt cheap

– portland finally got a magical cvs coupon machine

– i paid $.84 for hot pants

– i got famous. twice

– i capitalized on other people’s laziness

more than anything, i survived. i got through all the chaos, i learned A LOT, and i think i might actually be better for it. why does self improvement have to be so traumatic?