a day at the derby.

so, you’re not riding the IKEAbus. maybe you don’t need furniture, or you don’t have $30, or you have a pathological fear of bus bathrooms… or maybe you’re not just into my shit. whatever the reason, you may have some real estate available on your schedule today.

let me make a suggestion…

in addition to being IKEAbus day, today is also derby day.

but not the kind of derby with the fussy hats and mint juleps, the kind of derby with hot pants and ass kicking. i’m talkin about MAINE ROLLER DERBY bitches!

in the last few years, the maine roller derby scene has caught ON FIRE! and with names like mae snap and fist city kitty, it’s easy to understand why (well, easy for me). basically, if you love sexy fast paced brutality on rollerskates (and who doesn’t?)…

so tomorrow when you’re not riding the IKEAabus, consider taking your sweet self and your spending dollar ($13 at the door) on over to the portland expo at 6 pm to check out the big battle for ultimate rollerderby victory between portland’s own port authority and the boston massacre. i can promise that you will be bowled over by the action and the athleticism, and the fact that not even one of them seems to care if their fingers get rolled over at top speed. the soundtrack to the bout will be provided by todd the rocket, and some half time booty shakin from my favorite peeps at vivid motion.

there’s even a free post-party at the empire dine & dance .

not every town is awesome enough to have rollerderby, but if we want it to stick around, we’ve got to get out there and show these ladies our best fist wavin’ trash talkin’ beer swillinn’ SUPPORT!

*full disclosure- i have no idea if there will be beer or not. cursory google searches told me NOTHING.

so what’s this groupon shit anyway?

last year when groupon really busted onto the scene in maine, i must have gotten like 48 emails from friends and family members telling me that i should think/write/talk/pee my pants about it.

so i checked it out… and frankly, it left me a little limp (boner analogy intended).

now conceptually, i think it’s a great idea: 1 deal, limited time, limited avialabilty… the deep discount IS seductive, as is the fact that there needs to be enough people taking the deal in order for it to be valid.  but for some reason, i was expecting to be completely blown away, and i just wasn’t.

for example, today’s portland deal is a discount car wash.  i’m sure a lot of people are really enthusiastic about this with the salt/slush tornado that’s been going on here lately, but me, not so much. i suppose with a site like this, it is a bit optimistic for me to expect that the daily deal to appeal to me even the majority of the time… but to date, there has only been one deal that has even vaguely interested me ($10 at barnes & noble for $5). groupon just doesn’t have what i want.

that said, i should be thanking groupon for being so exceptionally copy-able. groupon clones have been shooting wildly from every orifice of the internet for the last year or so, and some of them actually do give me the discount boner that i so deeply desire (although many of them [sorry loonEdeals] could sill use A LOT of work). but what i’ve realized in the last year as i have slugged through the symphony of variations on groupon, is that for me, it’s not about the format that makes a site desireable to me, it’s what they’re selling.  groupon might be the most elegant of the deal sites, but if it only offers car washes and pricey spa treatments… i’m never going to buy.

i’ve made a small list of online deal sites below (of various ilks) that i’ve been enjoying lately, but there’s so many out there! what am i missing?