the september issue.

if you’ve ever been a reader of fashion magazines, you know that the september issue is notoriously huge (usually about 2 inches thick). one would think that its increased bulk is due solely to the coverage of the fall collections, but one would be wrong. sure, maybe fashion week coverage adds a few pages here and there, but far more than half of the 758 pages in this year’s september issue are ads, ads, and oh- isn’t that some more ads over there?

now, these ads are usually for all sorts of high and brands- your standards chanels, and guccis and marc jacobs types… nothing remarkable (actually, they all tend to look exactly the same to me, you would think they would try harder). however, this year, i noticed and interesting trend. in addition to the standard fancy pantsness, there was a disproportionately large amount of ads for more pedestrian (discount even!) chains trying to keep up with the couture.

lots and lots of celebrity designed lines (karadashians for sears? oh lord!), but also just a general attempt to show that dowdy department stores are at least trying a little bit more than usual to keep up in the contemporary fashion marketplace. edgy ad campaigns! more modern shapes!

well, i ripped all the ads out, and decided that i would do a shopping tour of this supposedly affordable high end design. i am most excited for lagerfeld for macys, and french connection for sears, but my initial inspiration came from the very charming (most especially amongst the satin draped airbrushed bone racks that the rest of the ads were schilling) “money can’t buy style” campaign by kmart.

well, it just so happened that was going to augusta this week, where resides one of the last remaining kmarts in maine. also, it is my hometown.

weekend pickthrough- extra litigious edition.

i’ve already expressed my displeasure with the 3 day weekend. well, just to even things out a little, i would like to discuss my equal disdain for the 4 day week. 4 day weeks are a waste. schedules are thrown off, and nobody even really knows what day it is… but all are hyper aware of the unfairness that they are no longer on vacation. spaced out, phoning it in, like everyone in my life (including me) was stricken with a 4-day case of ADD.  needless to say, it was certainly not my most productive week ever.  the icing on this crazy short-week mental derailment cake is that someone actually threatened to sue me. of course it was a baseless accusation (and a whole lot of posturing), but disruptive and distracting (ok, and mildly amusing). but it pretty much took down what was left of this week with a stun gun and rendered it completely immobile. here are the few things i managed to filter out of this otherwise limp and unmanageable 4 days:

portland trash bags are getting more expensive (as if $7.50 for 10 trash bags wasn’t pricey enough!), load up now before they go up to $10.

pinkies out! the subtle etiquette of dumpster diving.

check your shaw’s flier! this week’s dollar doublers make this a kick ass week for crazy coupon ladies.

i might use “too many commas”, but at least i don’t use “unnecessary quotation marks“.

apparently, chunkys don’t hold up very well under extreme heat. the oven test determines the sturdiest beach candy.

bitch is lucky she didn’t get shanked.  don’t you EVEN get between a girl and her coupons.

yeah, i heart wood too. (in both the dirty and not dirty way)

i wonder what will happen to the bayside apartments if they blow out as student housing? love hotel? haunted house?

there’s a great deal on fiber one stuff at target this week. too bad it’ll make you wicked farty.

**UPDATE** according to the wonderous @jjdactyl over at gluten-free win, resistance is futile with the portland trash bag rate increase. apparently when the new bags come out, they’re just going to stop taking the old bags, and you’re just screwed. so ignore what i just said, and definitely don’t stock up! she recommends that we get a second recycling bin (ooh what about composting?!) to defray costs (both environmental and financial).