monday pickthrough- feet of fire edition.

yesterday didn’t happen. well it did, but i was trapped in the rehearsal bubble for 9.5 hours, emerging only to yell FEET FEET FEET FEET before ripping off my shoes and tossing myself on the sofa face down. michael bennett was clearly a sadist. since when does it seem like a good idea for ANYONE to perform ballet in HEELS? but seriously, come mid-march, i will be essentially excuse-free when it comes to post welching. but for today, just assume that i was taking the day off to honor the presidents.

anyway, on top of the utter awesomeness that is the phoenix best of nomination (my mom called me at work today to inform me that she had viewed the other nominees, and that i still had her endorsement), i also finally started my new gig over at coupon evolution, AND the portland twitter examiner gave me a really hot pimp. it’s only monday, but i think this is gonna be a pretty good week.

if superheroes were hipsters.

expand into new markets. cast panda bears.

the very best website in the state of maine (make sure your volume is UP).

easy on, easy off, quick as the flick of her tongue.

what, no taft? ranking the 5 hottest presidents.

i wonder where mainers rank on the pedestrian aggressiveness syndrome scale?

an old port eyesore finally gets put to pasture. (also, is it just me, or are that woman’s eyes INSANELY CLOSE TOGETHER).

the many wondrous applications of zalgo text.

probably the best jokes that anyone ever made about portland.

weekend picktrhough- hotel bar boozin edition.

i should really make an effort to round up the weekend pickthrough a little earlier in the day. namely, before i’ve had half a pizza (an incredible specimen in mushroom & cauliflower from otto on congress street), three bowls of party mix, and a couple of very stiff cocktails at the top of the east (apparently the go-to bar in portland if you think you’re on the jersey shore). basically, if this weekend pickthrough feels like it’s half in the bag, it’s because it is.

a traveling toy store of amazing artness. here, in portland. right now.

screw disney! all the cool kids are spending their summer vacations haunting abandoned theme parks.

it’s not an unbelievable discount if it comes with a side of bedbugs. BEWARE the budget hotel of horrors.

just when you thought that food couldn’t get any more hilarious/disgusting… in strolls the mcgangbang.

the onion’s most hilarious joke ever.

unlike the pogs of my youth, at least sillybandz will still have a function once the insane trend wave finally crashes on the beach.

the most beautiful dry erase animation ever about what motivates us. (very surprising)

dear grandma, stockpiling would make more sense if you were feeding more than just you and grandpa. plus, this expired salad dressing is gross.

if you don’t want me to make fun of you, you might want to stop leaving me these passive aggressive notes.

apparently my friends sam & BJ aren’t looking out for me as much as i thought. (i thought we were friends!)

just to open a little friendly discussion… is it just me, or does grimace look like a giant scrotum?