death of a salesman.

let’s be clear: i am a terrible sales person.

when i was in 2nd grade, i quit girl scouts because i didn’t like being forced to sell cookies. in 5th grade, i quit trick or treating because it felt too much like solicitation. despite the fact that everyone loves girl scout cookies, and virtually every person in america has a bowl of candy at the ready on halloween, i couldn’t shake the dirtiness of asking someone to give me something- or worse, BUY SOMETHING!

it’s kind of my worst non-dismemberment related fear. like twitchy cold sweat vomit grade fear.

so here we are at IKEA bus time again, and we have 27 people signed up for a bus that holds 50. and on the inside, i’m all like OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT. but then again, i don’t actually want to ask anyone to to buy a ticket. or flood my facebook and twitter feeds with plugs for my little project. so i’m sort of at a stalemate.

so my decision was to try and overcome my fear in the least invasive and annoying way i could think of- a short and to the point blog post. just one more before i give up, pat myself on the back, and say “hey, 27 people is still pretty sweet. you’re gonna have a kick ass time”.

so here it is.

IKEA BUS- come and get it!

good morning early birds! just in case you missed the first announcement, the IKEA BUS is back in action! tickets go on sale today, and because it’s late and i’m punchy, this year’s event is called: Revenge of the IKEA Bus (the Squeakquel)! The magic date is SATURDAY, MAY 19th, but otherwise the rules are pretty much the same as last year: donuts, bus, snacks, movie, ikea, frolicking, bus, movie, delivery, allen wrenches, bourbon.

this year, because i like to mix things up a little, i’m giving last year’s price of $30 a ticket for 1 WEEK ONLY. if you buy a ticket after 4/24, you’ll have to pay an extra $5. i have some ideas for snacks and in-flight movies, but i definitely need to get some more suggestions going on. i’m also hoping to work out a truck situation with some sexy local movers, but i haven’t nailed that one down quite yet. either way, there will be a truck (so now is your chance to buy a couch!) and free donuts. and fun. you don’t want to miss out on the fun. so get your ticket going RIGHT NOW, and start making your wish list.