worth the trip- coupon coma.

remember back in the day, when i used to post something coupon related almost every day? oh, and when my cabinets were puffed out with extra band aids and shampoo, and i had an overflowing box of donate items for the preble street resource center? man, those days were nice.

but then it happens- COUPON FATIGUE.

after a year or more of wringing every possible deal out of every possible store in town, a girl gets tired, or distracted, and let’s those weekend coupon fliers pile up, and even… EXPIRE.

i recently cleaned out my folders to realized that i had indeed lost almost 2 full months of coupon time. blacked out unconscious, i must have been paying full price for everything- TRAGIC. expensively tragic (the worst kind of tragic).

now at this point, the serious coupon clipping mantle has clearly been handed off to maine’s very own extreme couponer, i love to gossip, which is quite liberating (also, she’s a lot better at it). no longer do i feel the pressure to try to keep up with the rest of the coupon bitties, and have time to do other crazy shit like  throw clothing swaps and complain about “easy feet”. but this weekend as i leafed through my sunday circulars, i realized that i actually missed it.

i remember feeling so high (remember that money making vaseline lotion at shaw’s?) when i could grab something for free. like i was pulling off a tiny bank robbery or something.

i also remember having 5 unopened dove deodorants in my supply drawer. now i’m sadly chasing a single stick around my apartment… and sometimes i CAN’T FIND IT.

so this week, i decided that i’m actually gonna start trying to get back into the coupon game.  i have an empty paper box ready for preble street donations, and i feel mentally ready to be able to find my antiperspirant again.

well, it’s going to have to be a gentle re-entry, because there’s kind of shit for deals this week. and actually, i was zooming through the comments on this week’s iheartcvs.com deal rundown, and people seem grouchy that there hasn’t been anything awesome for a while. has the deal climate changed when i was away? are there still bargains to be had out there in the wild? here is what i’m stalking this week (better to start slow i suppose), let me know if i missed anything:

worth the trip- a little rusty edition.

god, it’s been a while. i’ve got a stack of uncut coupons collecting dust in my living room that fill me with longing and dismay every time i walk by them. the last few weeks i’ve just been so tired and busy, that all i can do is just go to trader joe’s and buy a lot of prepackaged bullshit (BEWARE- THOUGH DELCIOUS, TJS PREPACKAGED FOODS ARE STUFFED FULL OF BLOATY SODIUM). as a result, i’m a big bloated eggplant right now, and i’m having massive deal withdrawal. i got the coupon shakes.

i probably still won’t have time to go to the grocery store this week (let alone the rite aid or cvs), but to take the edge off of my desire, i figured i could at least round up some worthwhile deals for everyone else who does have clipping time in their schedule:

worth the trip- the black album (with a plaid b-side).

i feel like it was just halloween. how exactly is it thanksgiving already? now, thanksgiving means a lot of things to me- pie, defending my vegetarianism against people who think it is a personal attack, pie, rolling my eyes at football, pie, and most of all… BLACK FRIDAY.

to many, getting up at the pre-crack of dawn in order to shiver outside in the icy icy weather in a line of other assholes who also think that this is a good idea does not seem like a privilege. i know it seems wrong on a number of levels, but i can’t stop myself. i’m not even buying any xmas presents. i’m not even trying to score big ticket items at crazy low prices. i just really love a hot bargain, and have designs on expanding my chick flick collection for less than $2 a dvd.

now traditionally, one gets the thanksgiving paper and weeds through the ads while digesting their  gravy coated food baby after dinner (sort of like half time before the pie round). but since this is the internet age, and we’re all a big fucking pack of cheaters, there are multiple websites offering up all the black friday deal fliers days before anyone has to stick their hands into a frozen turkey and pull out the “giblet sack” (and people question my vegetarianism?).

i love black-friday. net, but it really doesn’t make a fucking difference if you go there or to blackfriday.info or even blackfriday.com. the point is that i’ve been planning my black friday shopping strategy for DAYS. here is my present  ACTION PLAN:

worth the trip- get thee to the grocery store!

i’m still having a hard time getting my shit sorted out well enough to get my worth the trip dispatches out by sunday- which is probably when they would actually be useful. however, i do have high hopes that at some point i’ll finally be able to shift everything back into its proper place. but for now… GET YOUR ASS TO SHAW’S IMMEDIATELY! there isn’t anything worth getting at any other store in town- unless of course  you want a page full of crappy weirdo cold remedies from rite aid, or some marginally discounted pumpkin pop tarts at target (ick).

i’m very serious.

now, take your flier, and flip it over. $10 back (coupon toward a future trip) when you buy $25 worth of jazz on this page. with the vast array of coupons available on bettycrocker.com, smartsource, & coupons.com… basically, it’s a page of mostly free food. here’s what i did:

-3 boxes cheerios- @ $2 each w/3 $.55/1 coupons doubled- $2.70

-3 boxes cinnamon toast crunch- @ $2 each w/3 $.55/1 coupons doubled- $2.70

-2 boxes reeses peanut butter puffs (BEST CEREAL EVER)- @ $2 each w/2 $.65/1 coupons doubled- $1.40

-2 boxes scalloped potaoes (gross, i know, but i love their salty dehydrated goodness)- @ $1 each w 1 $.55/2 coupon doubled- $.90

-2 “healthy colors” valley fresh steamers- @ $1.50 each w/2 $.50/1 coupon doubled- $1.00

-2 boxes cascadian farms sweet & salty granola bars- @ $2.50 each w/2 $.75/1 coupons doubled- $2.00

-2 packages pillsbury simply refrigerated cookies- @ $2.50 each w/2 $.55/1 coupons doubled- $2.80

SPENT: $13.50

GOT BACK IN CATALINAS: $20

basically, shaw’s paid me $6.50 to take home 8 boxes of cereal and a bunch of other jazz. i know that save for the veggies and the cheerios, it’s not exactly the parade of health food- BUT next week i have $20 that i can spend on whatever the fuck i want. zebra cakes? crisco? crystal light? i think i may re-attempt the freezer cooking dance come november (need to free up my time for nanowrimo), so maybe i’ll spend my bonus cash on supplies.

in case you wanna see what other magic can be worked with this deal, the coupon goddess is back from greece and officially tearing shit up at her local shaw’s. also, she totally spotted the free crest toothpaste (on sale 10 for $10 with $1/1 from the last P&G brandsaver), which i completely missed.

worth the trip- full cosmetic takedown.

so i’d never even heard of ulta before i drove by the mall a few days ago and saw that one had sprung up in the gaping void left by vinny ts (ok, maybe gaping void is a little dramatic- did ANYBODY go to that restaurant?). now generally, i would not entirely give a shit about a giant box store peddling makeup (sorry sephora, i’m just a low maintenance kind of girl), but they seduced me in with a $5 off $10 coupon in my sunday paper. i also did a little research and found out that in addition to their own lines and the high end lines they carry, they also carry all the drugstore brands, AND they take manufacturers coupons. SCORE! their flier showed a host of buy one get one 50% off deals on the drugstore brands, and i rounded up my very best coupons and headed over to see what i could do:

2 neutrogena blushes at $5.99 each with the BOGO50% sale, a $3/1 coupon (from all you) and a $2/1 coupon from this weekend’s paper= $3.99

2 NYC color nail polishes for $1.99 each with BOGO50% sale and a BOGO coupon from all you (seriously, if you don’t get all you, you’re doing yourself a profound coupon disservice)= $.99

2 cover girl eye shadows at $3.29 each with the BOGO50% sale, and 2 $1/1 coupons from the P&G brandsaver= $2.94

total= $7.92 minus the $5/$10 coupon from the paper= $2.92! i got all of the above makeup for less than $3! AND for joining their rewards club (totally free and painless to join), they gave me a sack of free goodies including a full size nail polish and eye shadow, scented body cream, and some fancy hair serum.  oh, and a 20% off coupon for next time. SUPER SCORE. also, the staff was super friendly and extremely patient with my crazy coupon ladyness. i’m hoarding this makeup for a secret project (details soon), so especially if they keep the coupon love flowing, i will definitely be going back again.

shaw’s- ok, i have never been a big fan of the “can-tastic savings” event, and this week was not particularly different. the only thing i deemed worth grabbing was the $.88 progresso soup. i had a $.50/2 coupon (doubled of course) from a coupon book i got in the mail, and considering they’re usually around $2 a piece, i thought that $.38 each was a good deal.

target– sadly, all the clearanced all natural fruit roll ups & herbal essences 2 packs were already gone (who are you target shelf cleaner? reveal yourself!), but they did have a good deal on hunts diced tomatoes at $.82 a can (screw you can-tastic savings) and i had a $1/3 coupon. $.48 a can seems pretty good, especially because chili season is upon us. they also had the deluxe velveeta mac & cheese (i’m obsessed with mexi-mac) for $1.52, which is pretty much as low as i’ve seen it anywhere (including walmart). there was a good $1/2 coupon in the paper last week (i think!), so $1 a box for me at least, seemed like a score. although again, nothing amazing.

rite aid- the free crest toothpaste and nivea lip care are definitely on the top of my list, but that schick coupon they’re all talking about on the deal websites doesn’t exist up here (kind of like the revlon coupons that never show up in the maine papers). also, i’m gonna pass on the incontinence pads. otherwise, meh. decent deal on frosted flakes ($1.60 per box when you buy 5), and cottonelle 12 packs are only $3.99 after +UP (the only coupons i could find were $.50/2), which is a pretty good price for toilet paper (especially if you’ve ever paid $1 or more for a “desperation roll” at a gas station).

cvs- roughly as much excitement going on at the cvs, but there is a good $.99 revlon nailpolish deal (after ECBs- limit 6!), which would be free if you had any revlon coupons floating around. i didn’t, but i got it anyway because i didn’t want to waste the $4/$20 that the emailed me this weekend. however, the big deal to look out for is lurking in the magic coupon machine. $5 off all halloween decorations and costumes with NO MINIMUM PURCHASE! i bought a pair of striped tights and some purple hairspray for  $.99.  the big bummer was really getting the coupon (it’s a “one day only”) in a store that had kind of a minimal halloween section.

big lots- there is a 4/$10 movie deal goin on at the big lots right now on all regularly $3 movies. i couldn’t find 4 that i liked (my local store didn’t have deep blue sea as advertised- FAIL!), but i did find a copy of rocket science, which is a great movie starring portland’s very own oscar nominee, anna kendrick.  anyway, even though i didn’t buy 4 movies, it still came up as $2.50. they’ve got some decent horror, and the usual sub “straight to DVD” quality (heartbeeps anyone?), but if you like to dig through big bins of crap- there are occasionally some gems in there.

worth the trip- an inauspicious beginning.

so i’ve been feeling a little (a lot) guilty for my complete lack of deal mongering lately.  the humble coupon lady roots of this blog have been lost somewhere along the way, and i don’t care for it. my original mission had been to make the coupon clipping, corner cutting lifestyle more accessible for single childless jerks like me, and i want to try to bring that element back a little bit. that said, it’s a fact:  i will never be a slick and sexy deal hunting machine. however, i do think it’s a worthwhile exercise to really take a look at the weekly deals, and make a perfectly edited list of everything that’s worth bringing home. not just what’s free or what’s cheap, but what’s actually good stuff. thus, i bring to you a new weekly feature: worth the trip.

unfortunately, as with most beta testing phases, there are a few bugs. for example, there really isn’t shit worth getting this week. i had hoped deeply that big lots might have a new shipment of $3 movies, or that target would have some sort of crazy gift card deal… but nothing. no, WORSE than nothing- BABY SALE?! or what about walmart’s pet sale (hasn’t that iams food been recalled enough?). lame.

cvs: if i were going to bother to head over to the cvs this week, i would pick up 2 packs of trident layers gum.  at $.99 each with $.99 in extrabucks back (limit 1), you can get 2 packs for free when you use this coupon. gum is good to have around, and this layers shit is pretty tasty. but seriously, that’s it this week for cvs. i’ll probably pass.

rite aid: not much better than cvs. i will be scoring on the free crest ($2.99 with $2 in +up rewards and a $1/1 coupon from last weekend’s p&g brandsaver). and if my sources (deal seeking mom) are correct, the right guard that’s on bogo (online price $3.99) will also be free after two of these printable babies. you can also get some free biotrue contact lens solution… but i don’t wear contacts and it’s not really donatable, so i’m gonna skip it.

shaw’s: again (are we sensing a pattern here?), nothing earth shattering, but a couple of decent deals on foods that i regularly eat. morningstar fake meats are all on sale for 2/$7. this is generally unremarkable (knowing that you can get them at target for $3.24 most of the time), but shaw’s does the double coupon thang, and i scored a bunch of $.50/1 coupons off a tearpad in the south portland store (don’t worry, i took almost all of them at first, but then felt guilty and threw a bunch back when no one was looking). $2.50 each still isn’t dirt cheap, but it’s about as good as it gets when it comes to morningstar. secondly, i think i’ll score a few larabars in the cart as well. you can rarely get these pricey fuckers for less than a dollar, and since they’re on sale for $.99 each, you can get 3 for $.50/ea. with this doubled coupon.

and that’s IT. not very exciting (or timely at this point), but it is my hope that with less of a vacation hangover and a more proactive spirit, i can get this going as a regular sunday feature (and get the weekend pickthrough back to friday where it belongs).  hopefully, the shopping universe will also give me something a little sexier to report than just free gum. now, i’m fully capable of missing things (or generally not paying attention), so if you see something awesome that i missed, please let me know. i want to know what you’re buying!!! (so i can get to the store first and clean them out).

rite aid, this is screwed +UP.

there have been a lot of changes happening at ye olde rite aid over the last few months. just when i was getting comfy with the intricacies of the single check rebate program *BAM* the rite aid wellness+ card shows up on the scene. i actually had some sort of weird proto version a long time ago, but it never actually did anything. at least this new version appears to have value in the form of product discounts not available to the plebeian public . but it’s all lies! in reality, they’ve taken the discounts that they used to give us freely (with love) and made them contingent upon us carrying around our little plastic card (so spiteful, and after all this time…). i think they’re feeling a little guilty about it though, because they’re throwing these new +UP rewards at us like a fistful of crumpled twenties at a spent hooker. but i’m a ho for coupons, so i figured…

but wait. i thought that they would work like extrabucks. dollar off coupons toward anything at rite aid except stamps, gift cards, cigarettes & booze- right?! um, no. or at least i don’t think so, but it’s unclear. very very unclear. picture it, yesterday afternoon… i go to rite aid to grab some discount tampax and see what this whole +UP business is all about. well, there was a bit of a fracas when some drunk dude when apeshit when they refused to sell him more booze without identification. so with all waving of arms and screaming of “douchebag!”, i didn’t actually end up looking at my receipt until i got home. what the fuck is this shit? $1 off a $10 seasonal purchase of $10 or more? so, in order to get my whopping $1 reward, i have to buy $10 worth of seasonal crap? and for that matter, what exactly constitutes seasonal? rubber swimmies?

the answer was equal parts cryptic and infuriating: “certain limitations apply, see store associate for details”. does that mean that i am now at the mercy of the sales associate to determine what constitutes seasonal? what if our definitions don’t agree? what if it escalates to shoving? what if i’m the next customer to get hauled into the parking lot screaming “douchebag!”?

all i’m saying is that this +UP situation is really putting a strain on our relationship, and you’ve done absolutely nothing to explain yourself. all this craziness, and NOT A SINGLE WORD ABOUT IT ON THE WEBSITE. who starts a program like this and doesn’t set up some basic parameters beforehand? it smacks of incompetence rite aid. incompetence!

weekend drugstore dash.

i’m a chronic overscheduler. between the job and the blog and friends and other related and non-related nonsense, i don’t have a ton of free time for things like couponing. which is kind of ridiculous and stupid, because i write a blog about couponing, which probably means i’m not doing a very good job. but anyway, i finally managed to steal a pocket of time this week to filter the expired crap out of my coupon folder and see what i had going on that i might not want to waste (like i usually do- see copious incidences of me being a coupon asshole below). shit, is my rite aid allergy rewards check already expiring on the 15th? i feel like the last one they sent me stayed fresh for way longer. too bad there’s not really anything amazing worth blowing $20 on this week at rite aid, and of course i’m hitting the stores on SATURDAY after everything good has probably already been cleaned off the shelves… but i didn’t buy $75 worth of allergy medication just to throw my rebate away. and well, a girl has to make do:

28 count prilosec that i require for life (and also because i’m an asshole who missed the 42 count sale last week), $18.99 with $3/1 coupon from the most recent P&G insert, and $4 SCR= $11.99.

2 boxes of kotex U tampons (you know, the hipster tampons with the crazy colors and wacky commercials) for $7/2 with 2 $1/1 coupons (they’re everywhere these days, especially if you got any of the rampant free samples), and $3/SCR= $1 each. according to the lady behind the counter, stacking is no longer an option at rite aid. you get as many coupons as you have items. to prove said theory- 3rd rite aid video values coupon was rejected. boo-urns 😦

speaking of video values, i rarely actually pay attention to the commercials you have to watch, but was totally intrigued by the tresemme dry shampoo. as a girl who often oversleeps on work days and ends up poorly camouflaging her dirty hair in pony tails, this seems like a pretty interesting option. even if it can just take the edge off the dirt, it will still be an improvement. review forthcoming. tresemme products on sale for $3.29/1, and i used my $2/1 rite aid video values coupon= $1.29.

i needed a few more filler items to make sure i got my $20 worth, so i grabbed a nivea bodywash for $5.39 (again, i missed it when it was free last week- fuck me), and used that $4/1 coupon that everyone was so excited about= $1.39. i also grabbed a box of puffs plus for $.99, and used a $1/1 coupon that i got from vocalpoint (i also have 3 $.50/1 coupons i’m hoarding until they got on sale at shaw’s and i can get more freebies).

i’m too tired/lazy to do the math, but somehow i got $.80 back in change after the $20 gift certificate, and $5/$25 that i got for activating my wellness card. btw, you should totally get one of those. and don’t forget, i’ll also be getting $7 back in single check rebates. AND there was a sweet $1/1 NYC cosmetics tearpad that i pillaged. i did leave a few behind though, so if you’re in the sketchy east end rite aid area (follow the trail of empty high gravity beer cans), go and grab them!

as it turned out, cvs was having some incredible deals this week, and since i never go there anymore, they’re presently trying to win me back with $/$$ coupons. this week i got $3/$15, which is good- because it’s a no pressure kind of amount.

crest pro-health toothpaste for $3.50 with $3.50 back in extrabucks! i had one coupon for $1/1, but the limit was 2, so i went for it anyway= $1 moneymaker.

again with the hipster feminine hygiene! this time $4.99 for a box of neon pantiliners- with $4.99 back in extrabucks and a $1/1 coupon= $1 moneymaker.

right guard something or other with the number 5 on it was on sale for $2.69 each with $2 in extrabucks. the limit was 2, and i also had a $3/2 coupon from coupons.com, and ended up yet another $1.62 richer.

probably my most impressive find (since is wasn’t mentioned on the majority of the coupon blogs) was a use for my stash of $2/1 pantene coupons from vocalpoint. on sale for $6.97/2 (random!) with $3 back in extrabucks, i again made $.03 on the deal.

with the $3/$15 and $9.50 in extrabucks, i paid $5.75 oop, and got a whopping $19 back in ecbs, hot damn!

with the exception of 15 very unfortunate minutes spent dressing room wrestling with a cheap lauren conrad for kohls zipper that made me bleed in not one but 2 places (and almost required that i call for help to get me free from its clutches), these are the kind of days that help me remember why i started this crazy blog in the first place. paying retail (or paying at all) is for suckers. i made money buying things today and there isn’t a side eye in the world that could make me stop.

corrections/retractions/apologies

one of my very favorite frugal blogs (and local no less), the portland penny pincher, has a little thing she calls frugal fuck-ups. ok, actually she demurely calls them frugal f-ups, but we know what she’s talking about. basically, it’s any attempt at saving money gone horribly wrong. a while ago, i informed her that the next time i had a really serious couponing cock-up, i would be giving her a little shout out. well, today is the day.

so several days ago, i had a big ole boner about the $.96 zyrtec deal. i had it all plotted out. i would go to the 2 peninsula rite aids (both sketchy as hell) on alternating days, completing my mission, and spreading things out enough so that the rite aid cashiers don’t think i’m making crystal meth or something.

day 1. grabbed the wrong zyrtec coupon (the $2 instead of the $4 for the liquid gels), and i actually needed the pills that night so i had to go through with it. $18.99 minus $3/$15 and $2/1 zyrtec coupon. $13.99 OOP.

*got sick in here somewhere and didn’t make it to rite aid again until thursday*

day 2. had all the coupons this time, just in case. good thing. terrifying west end rite aid didn’t have any of the 25 count liquid gels. gave myself a quarter sized blister walking a mile across town to get there, and refused to leave empty handed. $18.99 minus $3/$15 and $2/1 zyrtec coupon. $13.99 OOP.

day 3. back to my neighborhood rite aid with the drunks (well, the familiar drunks). finally, they have the 25 count liquid gels, and i have the right coupons. sort of. as it turn out, the $2/1 from the rite aid video values site is for the 40 count only. damn. also, i’m hungry so i buy a too expensive granola bar (fullbar) $2.39, and a bottled water $.99. $3.38 for the snack plus $18.99 for the pills, and minus $4/1 zyrtec coupon and a $5/20 from the rite aid video values site. $13.39 OOP.

day 4. it’s saturday, and somehow find my way to the gorham rite aid, hoping to find more liquid gels. bunk. it is cleaner and with less people buying malt liquor, but they only have the 40 and 70 count liquid gels left. i dig out a $2/1 zyrtec coupon that i got from somewhere, knowing that the $18.99 price will be gone tomorrow. oh, and somewhere there’s some cadbury mini eggs in there. fuck. $18.99 minus $3/$15 and $2/1 zyrtec coupon, plus $.88 for the candy. $14.87 OOP.

total: $56.24 minus $25 J&J SCR, and $20 zyrtec allergy rewards= $11.24.

um… not exactly $.96.

still better than the $50 a month i was paying when it was a prescription…. but i really need to pay more attention next time! check minus, room for improvement.

the glory of medical inconveniences.

as i have mentioned before, i have been blessed with a cornucopia of excessively irritating, but non life-threatening conditions. allergies, athsma, acid reflux… and that ‘s only the As. i am insured, which is a g-d miracle, but in the last 3 years, 2 of my daily medications have gone OTC (that’s over the counter for those of you who don’t live at the drugstore). in some ways, this is good. i don’t have to fuck around with prescriptions running out or doctor visits. and in many cases, OTC medication is cheaper than its prescription counterpart. unfortunately, in some cases it is not, and there’s no insurance policy that can help defray the cost. for many years, i payed $50 a month @ full retail for my priosec (acid reflux) and zyrtec (heinous allergies). good luck finding $600 a year hiding in the couch cushions to pay for it all…

that is until rite aid and i took a roll in the hay. and this week, we’re rolling hard. 4 days, 100 pills of zyrtec (the liquid gels are the better deal), $.96.

it’s a very simple operation really, (especially if your rite aid happens to be across the street):

day one. buy one 25 count bottle of zyrtec liquid gels. using the $3/$15 coupon here. the $2/1 rite aid video values coupon here (sadly, you only get one). and the $4/1 coupon here.

day two. buy one 25 count bottle of zyrtec liquid gels. using the $3/$15 coupon here. and the $4/1 coupon here.

day three. buy one 25 count bottle of zyrtec liquid gels. using the $3/$15 coupon here. and the $4/1 coupon here.

day four. buy one 25 count bottle of zyrtec liquid gels. um… i think you get the picture…

next, go here and enter your receipts.

then, wait patiently for 6-8 weeks until you receive your single check rebate in the amount of $25 (thanks J&J), and your allergy rewards certificate in the amount of $20.

finally, enjoy 3+ months of allergy-freeness for practically no money.

for the non-believers, i present you the math:

4 bottles 25 count zyrtec liquid gels @ $18.99= $75.96
minus $16 in $4/1 coupons
minus $2 in video values coupons
minus $12 in $3/$15 coupons

= $45.96

wrap it up in a $25 single check rebate for purchasing $50 in johnson & johnson products & a $20 allergy rewards check for buying $75 worth of antihistamines…

bottom line: $.96

suck it allergies.