disappearing act.

it’s not that i don’t love you , it’s just that i’m horribly horribly sick. since monday, i’ve been spending all my free time (that i should have been spending writing this blog including and especially the new “worth the trip” feature that i attempted to start last week) oozing mucous from my various orifices. oh, and drooling. my head is so congested right now that i can hear my own heartbeat in my right ear. i don’t know how it works, i just know that it’s gross and i feel like dying. anyway, i’m sorry. i hope to be semi-functional enough to write something tomorrow, but i make no promises. although if you’re really lucky, i’ll write something in a feverish delirium that will confuse and delight! or maybe i just lapse into a whisky and dayquil coma and you won’t hear from me for a couple of days. either way, i haven’t forgotten about you or this blog. i promise!

to entertain you while you’re waiting for me to break out of my snot cocoon, i have some exciting news for everyone! remember that time i had that ridiculous sandwich party? do you also remember how i vowed never to have another house party again? well, as it turns out, i’m a bit fat liar. sort of. i may never have a regular house part again, but come october 9th, i’ll be having a sexy 18+ house party! apparently durex is going to send me a big fat box of condoms and lube (and a vibrator for the hostess!), and we’re all going to get blitzed and watch a very serious video about BECOMING ORGASMIC. that’s all i know for now (do you really need to know more?), but details to come.

weekend pickthrough- blackout edition

so the last 24 hours have been a complete clusterfuck. thanks to an evening of 60+ MPH winds, i was completely without power from midnight last night, to about 4 pm today (yes, that picture was taken from my porch this morning as two city workers removed a large tree branch from the cable lines leading into my condo). on the upside, i didn’t have to go to work. on the downside, i spent the majority of the day inside my impenetrable blanket cocoon curled up on the couch trying to stay warm. on the double downside, my phone wasn’t charged- and there wasn’t an operational wireless connection within a one mile radius. eventually i did wander down to starbucks to thaw out and plug in my phone, but it was a sad sad day. it’s official, i am technologically dependent.

anyway, i’m sorry for the delay. i’ve been kind of crap at posting this week, and hope to have the slack picked up in the near future.

i haven’t run more than a mile in over a year. also, i got fat. despite this, in a moment of demon possession, i signed myself up for the maine cancer foundation twilight 5k. oops.

johnny weir is officially too gay for figure skating.

part of me wants to tell american apparel to fuck off, part of me wants to order like 10 of these right now.

is that 3 week old spaghetti sauce still safe to eat? still tasty has the answers. (via saving your green– another sexy maine bloggess on the scene)

why free gift cards are rarely ever free, portland penny pincher style.

vintage denture mayhem from the strange maine blog!

it’s ok christopher, i blew out of the spelling bee too.

at least my sandwich party is guaranteed to be less lame than this house party. (i’m imagining some very inappropriate party games here)

yes i am a mother fucking pterodactyl. (congrats on your book deal oatmeal!)