i’m podcast famous! also, i’m an asshole.

i’m a lucky lady. in the whole almost 3 years of this blog (my blogiversary is on the 23 if anyone wants to get wasted on cheap champagne with me), i’ve gotten nominated for stuff, got to speak at stuff, guest posted on a whole mess of wonderful bogs, and met a shitload of wonderful people.  but because i’m also an asshole ( a lucky asshole), i don’t say thank you enough.  or in this particular case, soon enough.

IKEA busted.

well, IKEA bus (the squeakquel) has come and gone, and i’m finally recovered enough to write about it (a mere 18 days later) (i know) (i’m sorry).

well, recovered enough to half ass my way through a recap where i’ll omit a lot of details and probably not tell you what you want to know.  i’ll pretend that it’s because i want to preserve the mystique for future riders. yeah. that.

but be kind, i’m lazy because i’m exhausted.

there were actually a number of passengers who asked me how often i  run the IKEA bus, and recommended that i do it more often. which is totally a nice compliment, if woefully uninformed.

IKEA bus is actually a lot of work. not that i’m complaining (i’m totally complaining), but the snack research, and the phone calls, and the paperwork, and deposits, and movie selections, and ticket hawking/guilt trips… twice a year (or monthly, as recommended) would probably kill me a little.

but enough of my whining. for all the work, of course it was AMAZING. some highlights:

to the boy with the blue haired girlfriend.

like much of america, i spent my president’s day honoring our founding fathers with my credit card. george washington is totally going to love my new pencil skirt (H&M was having a BOGO on all sale items). but my purchases, shockingly, are not the central focus of this post.

while at the forever21 (i know i’m probably too old to shop there, but i fundamentally don’t give a shit and they had a lot of really cute work blouses for under $20), i saw this young girl cruise by- boyfriend in tow. this is a pretty unremarkable thing at the mall, since it’s pretty much wall to wall teenagers (enough to give me a massive panic attack at the delia’s). but in the vast field of skinny jeans and ankle boots, messy ponytails and graphic Ts, this girl was a standout. bright blue hair in braids, and this enormous home made bow perched on top of her head that looked like she ripped it off a samantha doll circa 1992.

and there was her adorable boyfriend. trailing behind, happily bobbing through the cacophony of racks, fluorescent lighting, and pushy high schoolers.

and i looked at that ill advised bow. and i looked at that boy. and i realized that i needed to send a thank you note to every boy that i ever dated from age 14 to about 25.

ALL SYSTEMS GO!

on monday when i only had 13 tickets sold and no sign of picking up… i was ready to quit this bitch. i really didn’t think it was gonna happen. i even started making other plans for the 23rd.

i don’t know if it was my general sad sackness working the guilt angle, or just that people woke up and realized that they really did need to buy 25 billy book cases in order for their lives to feel complete… but i hit my half way goal and then a little bit more  yesterday.

as of this morning, i’m at 27 seats sold, and i’m sending the bus company my money- eek!  what i’m trying to say is that the IKEA bus is ON. ON. ON.

there are still 23 tickets left that i’m gonna be trying really hard to sell (anybody got any catchy poster ideas?), but the die is cast. i’m going through with it no matter what. i am also taking recommendations for what should go in my local food snack packs.

finally, i want to say THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU to everyone who talked about, facebook liked, and tweeted up this event. many of you couldn’t afford it or had other plans, but you still cheered me on. gennyfer shook down the moms over at raising maine! cindy and matt guilt tripped their coworkers! the entirety of the forge brandsstaff decided to drink the ikea bus kool aid!

anyway, thank you. i am overwhelmed! i make you my solemn promise that the ikea bus will be as awesome as i can possibly make it. and for those of you who can’t join us, i promise frequent twitter updates and lots of goofy pictures of people pretending to poop in the fake ikea display bathrooms.

chasing the white whale.

so a while ago, you might have noticed a little red box pop up on the sidebar region right over there –> this box was gently urging you to consider nominating broke207 for the portland phoenix best of 2011 poll. now, i am not a particularly competitive person by nature (unless of course we’re playing scrabble, in which case I WILL CUT YOU), but all the nominees get to go to pretty kick ass party… and i do enjoy a good time.

now, you might have noticed that the red box has magically morphed into a blue box. this is not magic, nor is it the talents of my hard working special effects team… but yesterday i found out that i actually GOT NOMINATED. i almost peed all over myself at work. sure, i put up the red box (hello, PARTY), and i threw down a facebook post about it… but i really didn’t expect anyone to actually vote for me.

now don’t worry, i’m not gonna get all faux humble on your ass or anything. i’m just really surprised, and really excited, and really grateful. so if you clicked on that box in the last few weeks, thank you. thank you a bunch.

well, i’m not gonna do that thing where i tell you that you have to vote for me, but i would really like it if you voted period. the other nominees for best blog are pretty fucking fantastic, and totally worthy of your support. you can find all of them in my blogroll also over there —-> but for the sake of ease in pointing and clicking, here they are:

i’m coupon goddess famous!

there are a lot of crazy coupon lady websites out there (and i do me A LOT). there’s actually even one called the krazy coupon lady, that is pretty rad. but if you’ve hung around these parts long enough, you’ll realize that in my book (and coincidentally also the highlander’s book), there can be only one.  and that one, is the coupon goddess. i love her because alongside her supernatural powers with coupons, she is a margarita swilling high-heel junky with a mouth for sass. she is also constantly blowing me away with her generosity. speaking of which, she was the one who gave me my blog start way back when in 2009, when she wrote a post about me and my irreverent (and profanity filled) coupon antics. since then, she has continued to pimp my site, and just be generally all around awesome to me. i really could not ask for more… but she gave more anyway. when melanie decided to take a 10 day blog break and jaunt off to greece (lucky bitch), she asked me if i would be one of 5 lucky bloggers to fill in while she was gone. i actually got to talk to her on the phone, and did a lot of yelling SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEE! afterward. i should probably apologize to my dog, he really DID NOT appreciate that.

but i digress. i wrote two posts- with proper capitalization and absolutely no swearing even (though several unfortunate typos that i am unable to correct)! one about me and how i suck at couponing (and that’s ok), and another one about a very weird experience i had with some himalayan pink salt. anyway, humongous thank you to melanie for the opportunity, and if you’re bored and want some good clean family friendly reading, you can check them out. or, if you’re really really bored, you can print them out and try to figure out where the swearing would have been had i written the posts for this site. either way, good times!

weekend pickthrough- full puppy takedown edition.

everyone, meet kazuki. finally, i have a dog to call my own, and it’s totally awesome beyond my expectations (seriously, are you looking at this dog?). but, it’s also totally tiring beyond my expectations. as it turns out, puppies can not be left alone ever, because they will chew/eat/throw up everything you own. this means that i have to get up an hour earlier than usual, i’m responsible for 2+ poop walks per day (including one that eats my lunchbreak every work day), and that i can’t ever really pay full attention to anything… because i’ve got to have one eyeball on that little guy at all times. i’m pretty sure  this is why everyone who squealed in excitement about us getting a dog, punctuated that squeal with the phrase “puppies are a lot of work”. so yes, puppies are a lot of work, and i have absolutely no regrets, but if i owe you:

an email
a graphic design project
a guest post
a blog redesign
a coffee date
or anything else that i’ve probably already forgotten about…

it’s probably because i’m passed out in a pile of shredded newspaper, or out on the streets hunting for a chew toy that simulates the mouth feel of human flesh. perhaps i could make up for my negligence with some quality puppy time?

no seriously… i said my teeth are real diamonds (kanye & new yorker cartoons. two great things that taste great together).

i scored an 8 on this crazy color acuity test, and so far no one else has even come close. it’s your job to put my in my place.

typestaches!

nike does a little recycling. (it involves big asses and lively feminist debate, you’ll love it).

i’d never even heard of such a thing before, but card skimmers are scary and could be hiding anywhere.

food and fashion don’t come in a more adorable package, let’s hear it for my new favorite local blog… sweetersalt!

i hate that supporting my beloved marden’s these days feels like supporting this jackass.

i would also like to send out a big sloppy thank you to original portland, brews & books, and portland maine daily photo for mentioning my cheap eats article (all excellent blogs absolutely worth checking out). what’s also crazy, is that not a single person has mentioned the lack of meat!