Q: why doesn’t this blog have an f.a.q.?

A: actually, i’m working on it. right now.

here’s a secret for you- during this summer/fall, i’ll be working on transforming this site from a free wordpress blog to my very own broke207.com domain. actually, i already bought it- but right now there’s just a crappy place holder page that both looks stupid and doesn’t make any sense. hopefully, with the miracle of modern technology (and my friends over at ibec creative), things will slide over all sorts of seamlessly- with a few minor upgrades that will make your life better- or at least probably not any worse. i hope that one of those upgrades will be the addition of an FAQ, but i haven’t figured out yet if there are enough unanswered questions about me and my pet blog to devote a whole section to answering them. that’s when  you arrive to clear up the confusion. if i were going to install an FAQ, what would you ask? or, do you think it’s a terrible idea?

here’s a starter question we can all try on for size:

Q: i find your use of all lowercase letters to be infuriating. are you some sort of crazy uneducated idiot? do you think you’re channeling e.e. cummings you pretentious prick? why do you torment me so?!

A: wow, those are some harsh words. why do you have to be so mean about it? actually, i have a college education (with a few extra courses on the side for emphasis), and have been capitalizing appropriately/successfully for many years. i even do so every day at my day job without complaint. i do enjoy e.e. cummings’ work very much, but my insistence on lowercase doesn’t have anything to do with him or his fantastic poetry. actually, kind of cranky reader, i do it because i have OCD (that’s obsessive compulsive disorder for those of you who missed the MTV true life– i have OCD). i am fortunate enough that my affliction is not so severe that i have to be medicated (although i have been medicated at various points), or prevents me from doing the things that i love to do, but it does creep into my life in funny ways sometimes that make me seem a little off/out there. i won’t eat a sandwich unless it’s cut diagonally (i will actually throw it away and get another one, or possibly cry, or more possibly both). i will throw away anything that i am hand writing if i make a mistake- rather than make a cross out (including post-its and informal notes to self). i am also obsessed with symmetry. i can’t even begin to calculate how much of my life i spend lining things up to make them parallel, or nudging them to make sure that they are square with the edges of the table. and that folks, is where the all lowercase happens. proper upper/lower writing is lopsided, and i find it visually displeasing. i can do it when i have to (work), but when it’s my turf (blog), i can do whatever the hell i please. i do find all uppercase writing to also be acceptable (my handwriting is all uppercase), but on the internet, people just think you’re yelling at them (thanks KANYE). thus, all lowercase it is! fun fact: my iphone auto-corrects all my improper lowercase letters, and i actually take the time to go back and undo the correction so that my symmetry is preserved. anyone know a hack for that?

so there it is… one question down. more to come? or TMI?

true life- i watch too much true life.

thanks to a little gentle prompting by the lovely kate over at a sweet disorder, i spent a good chunk of my evening eating pierogies and watching episodes after episodes of MTV’s true life.  i don’t have cable, and i had NO IDEA that there was such an amazing trove of free trash tv just waiting to be mined. next thing, you’ll be telling me that i can get toddlers & tiaras on hulu.

but anyway, sandwiched in between “i’m addicted to porn” and “i’m losing my hair“, i of course dug right the hell into “i’m a compulsive shopper“. wow, could they possibly find 2 worse human beings? so much ed hardy! so many polyester wigs! i have to say that watching this episode made the part of me that was worried about being a compulsive shopper a few weeks ago feel a lot better. i have never maxed out a credit card, never not paid my rent, never had my bedroom furniture repossessed, and certainly never stolen money from anyone (let alone my MS suffering mother) so that i could go buy hooker boots at the mall. seriously, even if you don’t have a shopping problem, watching this program will make you feel like a better person.

after the glitter coated tanorexic skank fest settled a bit (although you really do have to lay some blame on a father who consents to help his 18 year old daughter pay for her BOOB JOB), there actually was a small amount of useful information floating at the bottom of the barrel with the juicy sweatsuits and strip club desk jobs. it reminded me that there’s a group out there called debtor’s anonymous, that’s like AA for people who spend beyond their means. i was relieved to find out that i don’t meet the 8 out of 15 question requirement on their “do you have a debt problem?” quiz. but regardless, they had some interesting & useful information on their website on recovering from debt- whether you have a big problem, or not. sadly, not even DA couldn’t help these vapid tramps. but there’s no way you’re not already a better person, so i feel confident in saying that there’s real hope.